17 Oct 2009

Mumborg: 50th commemorative edition

First of all what is a Mumborg?
The word Mumborg was first created to describe my mother as she was edging ever closer to bionic woman and ever further away from normal human being status. I decided on this post , after playing with variations of the bionic/borg theme, ranging from mum/cyborg to cybernetic beast master. I use to refer to her as the 'Cupboard Monster' but that confused people a wee bit too much. I think they thought the 'Cupboard Monster' was my alternate personality, which is ridonkulous (that is Ralph, Hey Ralph!). Also Mumborg is another home run on google, I currently own the market on 'Mumborgs' woot. The question now is, does the mumborg still qualify as a borg like parent since having the leg removed? I voted and the answer is yes! Although the major metal work was in the leg that was removed, she now relies more on the electric wheelchair, which is bionic (sort of), so the nickname stays!

Today Mumborg hits 50
"The years between fifty and seventy are the hardest. You are always being asked to do things, and yet you are not decrepit enough to turn them down." By T.S. Eliot
I couldn't have a birthday month of my own, oh no, the mumborg sneaks in a mere 5 days later. That also means I must have been the best birthday present ever all those years ago, right? Also another year of her being in hospital for her and my birthdays, I think it is 5 or 6 years on the run! Maybe she is trying to tell me something? The good news is that, although she is in hospital for her birthday, she should be home rather soon.
"I think when the full horror of being fifty hits you, you should stay home and have a good cry." By Alan Bleasdale

Does 50 make a difference?
When I talk about the mumborg I am not sure how old most people think she is, as I am not sure most people realise how old I am? (shoe size age most of the time). Anyhoo, when I have talked about her in the past, people have said 'At least she has had a good life', which don't get me wrong is true (sort of). I then tell them her age, which was late 40's until today (now the big 50), that is met with almost gasps of horror. If she was 70 all this crap wouldn't be so bad, so it seems, but as she is only a youngster, it is bloody depressing, apparently. 

On with birthday stuff
A totally not true conversation (okay some of it is true)
Me: What would you like for your 50th birthday?

Mumborg: /thinking.......

Me: Its too late anyways, I already got you something.

Mumborg: Ohhhhh what?

Me: Tada! I got you a wooden leg and a parrot.

Mumborg: Erm, that is not quite what I wanted.

Me: What did you want?

Mumborg: M&S vouchers, some books and DVD's.

Me: Spoilsport! What I am going to do with these now?

Mumborg: Halloween?

Me: Yeah cool.

So it is a big Happy Birthday to the Mumborg,
Wee Claire probably says it better than me, so let me rummage through the vaults of time and find proof of this.

The superbly talented TJ strikes again, with this beautiful mumborg doodle.


  1. Happy Birthday Mumborg! May the Mumborg prosper and dominate Google forever. Thumbs up to Claire and her always brilliant doodles.

  2. Happy Happy birthday Mumborg! I hope you all have a wonderful day!!

    Claire! I love your illustrations! They are simply brilliant!! I love the Mumborg's expression haha!

    Enjoy it all!

  3. Please extend my birthday wishes to the Mumborg.

    And thanks for sharing doodles of the pre-Mumborg. Very sweet -- and fun to see the early years doodling.

  4. It looks like you were a doodler very early in life; so glad to see that you continue to do so into your advancing years! Speaking of doodles, do TJ's not have legs in honor of the Mumborg??

    A very happy birthday to your Mumborg and, again, I marvel at her resilience as being just a bit older than her myself I'm not sure I could handle this sort of thing anywhere near as well as she does.

  5. Happy birthday Mumborg! I'll be following the 50 path in a few years (gasp!)Hope you get to go home soon!

  6. Claire, happy birthday to both the mumborg and your good self!
    And I concur, her wheelchair status definitely qualifies her for the continued use of the 'mumborg' moniker. Say... is there any chance that eventually the mumborg might get one of those wicked totally robotic legs to help her get around? Then she'd be like, mumborg to the power of six! Or something...

  7. Aw, happy birthday to the Mumborg. She HAS to be the Mumborg-- all of us call her that now, you can't CHANGE it!

    I love the parrot on your shoulder-- very nice!

    And TJ's amazing, isn't she? That gal can draw!

  8. Happy Birthday and a big {{HUG}} to mumborg!

  9. Hope you and the mumborg both had a wonderful natal day celebration. Decided to check Google. You do realize that you have made your mother internationally famous. There aren't too many humans living or dead who can command more than ten pages of listings ... The MUMBORG can. Now that you have taken over the planet do you have plans for the universe?

  10. "You're watching?" Oh mygod, the old artist coot thought. "Now I gotta say somethin' uh...sweet...uh,no...uh, maybe serious-like? More uh...somethin' uh...profound?" His head raced with thoughts. First, he had not been visiting any of his listed friends the past weeks...and guilt keeps squirming in. "Oh, my...."

    "Just keep it simple, Ralph," the Muse said.

    I like your work. Your blog. Creative artists/personalities ARE here on BC. You thankfully remind me of that.

  11. claire! thanks for all of your comments (sorry i haven't gotten back to you earlier - i'm getting bad at responding when i'm grumpy)

    i've been feeling a lot better (thank you, THC pills...) and i hope your mum is healing wonderfully. my mom is going to be 50 next year and she changes the subject every time her birthday comes up :-)

    when does mumborg get to come home???


  12. Lol. Interesting post. very funny. Mumborg...ha.

    I love your header by the way :)

  13. Happy Birthday to Your Mum, Claire. October is a great month to be born and I really like reading about your close relationship with each other.

    Click my site and see the October HBDay Cake!

  14. Happy Birthday to Your Mum, You're site cracks me up. I love this story. You are very talented with your writing.

  15. Happy belated birthday to Mumborg... and I DEFINATELY need to keep up...

  16. All great mothers were born on Oct. 17th. I can say that because my mother was born on that day too (but in 1923; sorry to say she has gone to Valhalla (she was part Swede)now. Live long and prosper Mumborg. :)

  17. I had a friend once (okay, I've had more than one friend... not the point) who had a friend, who had her very own Mumborg (or whatever she would have named her in 1980 Los Angeles). On week-nights, when she wanted to sneek out to the clubs, she would toss her Mumborg's bought-and-paid-for leg out the window after her usual dinner and a six-pack... just so there would be no chasing her down the driveway at midnight.

    It seems that you and your Mum have a better relationship than Krusty (that was HER name) and her mother.

    Now back to coffee.

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