21 Nov 2008

Friday Thingamabobs 6: The Dave and foul language one.

Friday already! Shitty McShit, brother of Fuckity McFuck and father of Crappity McCrap. I don't know why Friday always sneaks up on me, what have I ever done to it? Friday is meant to be all nice and it should be all 'Yay Friday', instead its fuck off and die. I am sorry for the bad language (not really).

Two years ago as recorded on this blog
I ate Haggis, much to the disgust and horror of some naysayers, unless you have tried it, Shurrup! Although at the time I posted that post only three people were reading this here blog. A lot more people moaned about the yummy goodness that is haggis the second time I posted about it. I was also given the poem that adorns my sidebar, in college, around this time two years ago. I still love it as much now as I did then. Have you read it? Do you like it?
One year ago as recorded on this blog
Posted a pic of younger dude Connor, I was feeling all sad around this time last year because the mum was in hospital, my foster niece had gone to another family. Jemma and kids would also be embarking on their new life in germany, so I was spending as much time with the nephews as possible at that time (sniffles).
That led to me kicking myself up the arse, which somehow led to the start of my DOODLES on this blog, see how shit they were back then.  Looking at them now, its mad to see how much my doodle style has change, tis mad indeed.

This week in Claire World
Dave, you didnt know him, but he has carked it.

Dave is the parents way of saying , Move Out! We have a pet dinosaur and have no need of you. Then Dave has this tragic accident...........

With the parents being technologically challenged, it was left to me to sort out Dave. Read the correspondence below and see how I handled the situation:
Hello Support person,
Instead of purchasing a cat or dog, my dad bought a pleo for the mum. Unfortunately Dave (the pleo) has broke and its been left to me to sort him out (as the folks are technologically challenged).There is no problems with 'Dave' moving his head side to side but he cant lift his head up at all, even after turning off, recharging, turning back on etc. It is well within the 90 days return period, but can Dave be fixed?

Dear Claire,
We have reviewed your inquiry regarding " Neck Problems " as reported in Case number [00011529] on 11/20/2008.
Here is the suggested answer/solution to your Support Inquiry:
Concidering that you are in the UK, I am aware they have a two year warranty.  I would suggest returning your pleo to the retailer for exchange.
Thank you again for contacting UGOBE

 Bye Dave....
As well as not harming Dave, I have had loads of college stuff to catch up on and finally heard that boiler is getting replaced on Monday! Also while I remember, in the photograph 'lonely figure in the sea' it's not actually a person, its one of many statues. There are lots more photograph's from last weekend's walk, which I will post at some point in the not so near future. I am made up you liked it and some of you picked up on why it appealed to me (not the naughty bits, well a bit).

To do
Be prepared to read a lot of 'fuck this' and 'fuck' that over the next few days, if I get near a computer. Today I will buying a dress (maybe), shopping for birthday cards/presents, dyeing someones hair, drinking, ironing, shaving bits and cleaning.Saturday is going to very very busy, I will be getting hair done, frosting cupcakes, going to a party, getting drunk and taking photographs. Not necessarily in that order, but near enough. Sunday I will be hungover and getting house ready for boiler installers to arrive on Monday. As well as doing college like stuff and rocking in a corner. That's just the bloody weekend, the rest of the week is just as chaotic but that's enough to write about for now.

You do
Hmm well seeing as I just wrote a post, just below this one, full of links to all sorts of bollocks, you should go and do that.
Also why not do this, A soup recipe written for me, sort of.
Right you have got the recipe? Now make it for me and bring it to me!
and this.
That way you wont miss me so much or something..


  1. Haggis = yummy.
    Connor = cute!
    Doodles = fun.
    Dave the Pleo = sad.
    Letter to support = brilliant.
    Lonely figure in the sea = lovely.
    Weekend plans = hairy.
    Rocking in a corner = not suggested.
    Watercress and Spinach Soup = hungry.

    Me = Supposed to be writing, reading blogs instead. Shh!


  2. I'm hoping next year when I make my trip over, if I get to hang out with you(that's if you still want to), that Friday's are a little more enjoyable for you! LOL, there'll be no curling up and rocking in the corner, unless you're in my rental car with me behind the wheel. BTW, are the pedals flipped on manual transmission cars in the UK compared to the States?? It should be interesting to say the least...LOL

  3. I love all the fantastic renditions of the word fuck. :D

    Your weekend makes my day cry!! :D I only wish I had the mental fortitude to do THAT much in any given 24 hour period. I envy your youthful exuberance to do all of this, all while still being able to get drunk and thusly recover from that drunken state!!

    You, lovely Claire, have every reason to say Fuck as many times as you wish!! :)

  4. Geesh Cheer up you bloody Fuck. My goodness. That picture of that Haggis scared me. I can't imagine what it is..... Whirl that plate into a shake and choke it down that way. I miss your nephews also, damn bloody brother in law... damn him. Well, I certainly hope you don't get the Sunday hangover... Drink plenty of water that night before drifting off to lala land oh yeah and take an aspirin... I forget what you call them.

    Your American Oregonian friend Callie Ann loves you... Hug Hug Hug... now your probably saying... "Get the bloody hell off of me Callie"... Ha ha Ha ... later Dude!!!

  5. Hmmm the closest I ever came to haggis was haggis flavour crisps, and they were pretty weird. Hope you manage to get everything done and survive to tell the tale!

  6. Well ... that was ... er ... refreshing ... 'tis nice that you wrote an actual post but holy fuck, woman, could your language have been any saltier at the beginning???

    Hope your Friday gets a little better - I figure it's just another day myself but that's because I work so many bloody hours that Fridays and weekends and all that 'normal' stuff doesn't exist!

  7. your To Do List just gave me a panic attack! Geez. You are mad busy!

  8. I know some people think that haggis is offal but it really is delicious ......

  9. hahah you sure have a way with words claire. Those fucking damn fridays that creep up on you!

    i'll try to include more crappy doodles in most posts from now on. ;)

  10. THAT is your virgin Doodle? HAHAHA! It IS pretty crappy. And dang it girl...I'm gonna come over there wash your mouth out with SOAP!

  11. I wouldn't want to be replaced just cause I had a stiff neck. What do they do with old Dave? Poor bastard.

  12. ...there was some fun in there somewhere though wasn't there? Like parties? Confusing list though, I'd be likely to end up frosting my bits, shaving my head and getting my cakes done. I think I did have a weekend like that once, but that's another story. Anyway, hope you are recovering from the maelstrom now.

    PS:- I have some tinsel for you over at my blog!

  13. Why is it I feel sadder for Dave than for you??!

    I've yet to try haggis, but maybe someone will make me eat it for the next Burn's Night...

  14. You should have explained better what a Haggis is, naughty you. Allow me. A Haggis is a little creature which runs around hills in Scotland. It has adapted itself to the hills by growing one of it's legs longer than the other. It always runs around the hill in the same direction, longest leg toward the bottom of the hill.

    The method for catching Haggis thus becomes evident - you chase them round the hill the wrong way until they topple over and roll down the hill and into your accomplice's net.

    There is no charge for this information.

  15. wakey wakey C I have just tagged you :-)