20 Jan 2014

Piece-of-piss - Twas lurking in the 'drafts'

A long while back, I wrote a post about the mumborg entitled 'Taking the piss! literally' but it could have only be taken literally, if you knew what I meant in the non literal sense. If that even makes sense?
 I have friends from all around the globe, thanks to blogging, so they are usually the victims of my creative license, especially when it comes to 'British Slang'. I like to throw words at them, that can mean many many different things.  To be honest though, it is generally myself that ends up being confused.

For some reason, the words that are the most fun, are the ones that are slightly rude or naughty, so I don't know what that says about my friends or in fact myself...

Please don't continue reading if you are easily offended, suffer from a lack of a sense of humour or are miserable in general. There will be no apologies, for the kind of language that I use in the written form. Swearing or 'Cursing' is the not the lowest form communication, check out facebook or your text messages for that.

The Word of the Day is.... Piss

All things 'Piss'

Middle English pissen, from Old French pissier, from Vulgar Latin pissiare
That would be urine, the yellow stuff.

Have a piss
That would be, to urinate.

Going for a piss
That would be, going off to urinate somewhere, hopefully in an actual toilet/urinal.

On the Piss
Whoop! You are out for a few bevvies, probably more than a few. (Bevvies = alcoholic beverages).

Drinking session: Usually this is used when one is celebrating something, like a birthday i.e. So and so's 30th is going to be a right piss up... or to reward yourself for making it through the day.

This when you are drunk, not tiddly, but totally sloshed.

Pissed  (part two)
Over the ponders use this expression for anger, funny Americans.

Pissed yourself
I am afraid you have wet yourself, probably due to being pissed.

Pissed your pants
Guess what? You have wet your pants. That could be anything from your knickers to your trousers. You have done this because you have laughed so much that you P.I.M.P (pissed in my pants, well not my pants, your pants!).

Piss off
Someone needs to get away from you and fast! They have annoyed or angered you.

Pissed off
You are angry, very angry. HULK SMASH!

Pissed someone off
Uh oh! What did you do? You have angered someone muchly.

Take the piss
To make fun of someone, normally in a sarcastic manner.

Takes the piss
Someone is taking liberties mate, totally unreasonable behaviour.

Taking the piss
You are still making fun of someone, in a sarcastic like way.

Same as take and taking of the piss, just with the words swapped around.

Pissing down
It is raining, raining hard. You have severely regretted not bringing that umbrella with you.

You have been pissed too many times, you are drunk (n.) and possibly an alcoholic

Piss artist
Same as a Piss Head, but said in a slightly more polite manner.
or a Billy Bullshitter
or someone that frequently takes the piss.

Pissing oneself
Laughing very hard, or in fact wetting yourself, or both.

Pissing in the wind
Well you might actually be pissing in the wind, which sounds rather messy.
More likely you are doing something even more fruitless and useless than that.

Piss easy
Something is very easy

Piece of piss
Apparently this comes from the phrase a 'Piece of Cake' albeit a vulgar version of it. Which means something was very easy to do.

Piss All Over
Pfffffft! You think that is good? Look at this! I piss all over that. You are bragging about something or other. 

Piss Away
You just had something and now you have wasted it, whether it was a pot of cash or something else.

Piss around
Wasting time and taking your time about it. 

Piss about
Same as around, but using the word 'about' instead.

Piss Poor
You really should have made more of an effort, because what you have done so far is bloody piss poor.

Piss Flaps
This is probably the naughtiest one in the the 'Piss' family, it refers to lady bits. Although I have only ever used it when cursing at someone annoying.  Instead of saying 'Phooey', I might instead say 'Piss Flaps'.

This is not the first time I have attempted to explain 'British Slang', emphasis on the attempted. Just in case you missed the epic 'Pants' post, you can find it here PANTS.

If you haven't realised it yet, I am a very silly person at times and I most definitely like to take the piss. Some may think that it is vulgar, but to that, I say PISS FLAPS.  I made myself laugh a LOT whilst writing this post and that is what counts, well for me anyways.  Sometimes life is ridiculous at times, both horribly and funnily, so naughty words alleviate some of that. Which basically means get over yourself or piss off. I have had this post saved in my 'drafts' section,for about five years or so and have only just rediscovered it. 

Have you looked in your 'Draft' folders lately? I found some very odd blog post titles in there, most I haven't got a clue about. Yes, even odder than this one! 


  1. Man, that's a lot of piss! In the US (at least in the Midwest) it's not used quite so often. When we have to go, we take a piss instead of "have" one, but do get pissed off (angry) and tell people to piss off I we want them to leave you alone. Thanks for sharing. I was not offended at all. :)

  2. Whoa ... remind me to never piss you off (which is still infinitely better than being pissed on unless you're into that sort of thing!) but as I do know that you quite often like to take the piss, I find this pissed post to have been in great fun!