31 May 2008

And the award goes to.....

I am bloody awful at making decisions and want everyone to be a winner, but like the highlander, there can be only one! Hey I liked that film before anyone says anything.
I tried to stick with what made me laugh the most, using strict guidelines such as lmao, pimp, rofl and lol. So without further ado I shall announce the winner.

The Winner is Kai! She was trying to horrible about my teeth but as its my sister and not me in the picture, that just made it funnier (Sorry to my sister and her teeth). So let me know what you want in your doodle and I will try not to be too horrible in it.

Nobody loses with me,its just that you have not quite achieved the high status of making me rofllmaopimplol yet.

Gold star = Nissa was pretty damn funny but no biscuit this time, it was bloody close though!

Silver star = Thriftcriminal if only he had said 'pot of gold' :)

Bronze star= For the best llama tongue inspired caption, there were quite few but tazdog pipped you to the post.

Special award= Most likely to score with Llama
Adrian! Which is better than scoring a creationist/dinosaur I suppose :)

Thank you for all being inspired by llama shagging and snogging.

Mr.GorillaSushi aka Jason needs some thanks for putting this together although only three people joined this time, with the carnival I mean, not my little caption thing.
I know lots of you love doing caption contests!
Read this post Carnival of Captions and think about joining in on the next one. You make up your own rules in regards to prizes, length of time for caption contest etc.

Want to do it again sometime?
(the caption contest)

30 May 2008

Clown Hookers and Doodle Boobs

First things erm first? How did my Make Up trial go, Clown or Hooker? neither! Make up trial went really well. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised that you liked the idea of a clown hooker, you read my blog after all. For those that don't know what I am talking about, yesterday I went for a make up trial for the wedding next week (I am a bridesmaid, not bride). I was more than a little apprehensive as I don't wear a lot of make up and have pale skin. This meant there was a higher than normal chance of looking like a crazy oompa loompa/clown/hooker in my mind. I suppose there is still a chance I could turn out clown/hookerish on the day though.

Elsewhere in blogland;
A while back Mr.45 expressed an interest in my doodles, well that's what I thought he meant anyways. After some confusion and one of us feeling silly (not me), I decided I would have a whirl a doodling something for him. Boy is he demanding, he wanted all sorts of daft things! Like rainbows, clouds, teddy bears and love hearts. After cyber bitch slapping him and getting him to man up, I suggested pole dancers, pussy (cats) and other cool things.

Phase one turned out okay but was lacking something and the doodle boobs weren't quite right.
Phase Two was much better! I even managed to fit in Scallop Man!(The story of Scallop Man). Mr.45 then fiddled with it some to make it fit in with his theme. His latest post explains a bit more about what is going on. There you can read about how I successfully managed to talk him out of doing a love poetry blog.
For the full effect check it out on his website.45 Caliber Headspace

I am still deliberating over the Caption This contest, be patient children.

29 May 2008

Caption This!

Mr.Jason aka monkeyrawfish aka GorillaSushi is hosting a caption contest carnival thingie.
He mentions it here Carnival of Captions.
So I decided why not have a whirl at doing my own caption contest.
This provides me with the perfect opportunity to not write much and post a picture!

So CAPTION this!

Heather snogs Phil the llama!

The winner will be whoever amuses me the most!

What do they win?
A personal doodle by me, a nice post with said doodle and a bit of link lovage.
Now I have to pick a winner, which is hard as there is more than one that I really like. I may put it to a vote over the weekend.
Thanks to everyone that played along, especially the new folk that hopped over. My regular commenters know I love them.

There will be blood!

Bionic Mum

I love thinking of snappy post titles and before you worry, no I haven't gone postal (yet) and rampaged through the village in a crazed frenzy.
The mum aka cupboard monster has finally gotten her operation date! It will be a week today and there will be blood!
Read here for more mum info *the Mum*. It is a humdinger of a operation, I last mentioned this way back in December Operation bionic leg is go go go and it has took this long for the doctors to get their shit together. She will go into hospital on the Wednesday and then they operate on Thursday at some point.
Then the wedding is on the next day,nice timing isn't it? So that adds a wee bit of stress, but I am just glad she is having the operation at long last.
I am going to be mad mad mad busy up till then, with coursework to be done, last minute wedding stuff and the mum. Tomorrow I am going for my make up trial for the wedding which will hopefully not make me look like a clown or a hooker or worse a clown hooker!

Excuse me while I spontaneously combust.

26 May 2008

Do some work damn it!

do some work

In case you have trouble guessing what this doodle is about, it means Doodle Claire aka me is messing about too much here and not doing enough bloody college work!
I am pissed off at myself and woeful inability to do my college work, look I am even blogging about not doing work, instead of doing bloody work!

24 May 2008

Doodle Week Galleries

If you want to see the doodles from Doodle Week, other than these little versions then check them out on the Doodle Week blog.
*Doodle Week*
Some feedback would be really appreciated, because I am a grump and they are time consuming. Do you like them? Is it worth doing?
So far I have collected all the 'Doodle You', 'Doodle Monster' and 'Doodle Animal' doodles.
Only a squillion more to go!

Update: Erm twas a little grumpy when I first wrote this, as I deleted the first two instead of saving them. Which of course put me in a bad mood!
What I meant to say was thanks for doodling and I will have to be a bit better organised for the next doodle week.

Doodle You GalleryDoodle Monster GalleryDoodle Animal Gallery

23 May 2008

The Dandelion

TheDandelion collage

Hey I have had my first whirl at a collage and arty farty shots!
I entitle this
'The Dandelion'
It twas a dandelion growing amongst its many many brethren on an unkempt lawn, I photographed it, picked it and the wind blew it away.
How is that for a tragic but poetic tale?

Then I had to run inside and wash my hands as picking dandelions makes you wet your pants*

*This is what I was told as a child in school,that if you pick dandelions you will wet the bed.
I myself have not wet myself in a dandelion picking incident.

22 May 2008

Doodle Week the update

Hooray I am feeling somewhat better! I am still on the cough medicine just in case I relapse and/or because I am addicted.

I am in the process of collecting all the doodles from Doodle Week so that I can turn them into some collage/mosaic thingies. To do this I need them all uploaded to the flickr group and correctly tagged which is a pain in the arse but produces the nicest results when using the mosaic maker. So can you please make sure that your doodles are on the flickr site or that you dropped your links on the right doodle day so I can find your doodles and upload them for you.

Is that clear?

Once this process is completed I can then start on the badges for those that joined in and planning Doodle Week the Summer edition.

UPDATE: The 'Doodle You' mosaic is up on the Doodle Week blog now, oh and here as well. Go and visit the Doodle Week blog and add your suggestions for Doodle Week July themes.

UPDATE: The Doodle Monster gallery is up! check it out as it slots in nicely next to 'Doodle You'

Doodle You GalleryDoodle Monster Gallery

20 May 2008

I am unwell, meh.

Claire is ill

I am still feeling unwell, so this doodle is a combination of that and cough medicine.

19 May 2008

The Hen Night!

Hen Night Collage

Check out the rest of the photo's here:
Emma's Hen Night!

In case you don't know what I mean by Hen Night, I mean a Bachelorette Party, the last big night out before the bride gets married. I am not sure whether these are the same all around the world but over here you need a few simple ingredients.
What are these ingredients? Most importantly you need a Blow Up Rob, shit I mean a Bride to be. Then you need Blow Up Rob, nope I meant Bridesmaids and friends, then you need Blow Up Rob.
The destination was Liverpool, which is in the North of England and a popular choice for hen nights. Liverpool is popular as it has lots of pubs,clubs and is generally a fun place to go out with a bunch of girls dressed up. The theme was Moulin Rouge, just in case you cant tell from the photographs above. I was more than a little reluctant to dress up and you wont get to see what I looked like, as I was taking the photographs. Everyone looked pretty good and it was quite fun dressing up, even if I normally hate stuff like that.
Blow Up Rob got the most attention by a mile, was stolen twice but was returned after some police intervention and help from some lovely men. It probably looks like everyone was really drunk but in fact nobody was, you don't need to be when your out with us lot.
As punishment for being out all weekend I feel like death overloaded with sinus crap, so this post isn't as funny or long as it could of been. I may come back to it, I may not. The wedding is in less than three weeks now and there is a lot going on with that and college.

I shall be going over the finer details and traditions of a proper Hen Night over at BritishSpeak in a future post.

Play with me!

I haven't got time or the inclination to write a long post tonight, so here is a sneak preview of one of this weekends hen night photographs starring Heather aka my little sister and Blow Up Rob.
In the photograph Heather is playing/abusing poor Blow Up Rob when we got back to Emma's house, he had already suffered a lot and was somewhat deflated.

Blow Up Rob was first mentioned in this post here
Introducing Blow Up Rob

Heather and Blow Up Rob

17 May 2008

Busy busy busy

Last night I intended a jolly house soiree, in other words one of my friends had a house party and much drink was drunk and I stayed up till way into the am.
After reanimating my corpse this morning, I have made it back home and now I have to begin the preparations for tonight's Hen party.

I will update this post sometime tomorrow, late, way late, way way way late.

16 May 2008

First flower

First flower

Not posted any photographs for quite a while because of the madness that was doodle week! Don't worry doodles will be back shortly.
I finally figured out after a year how to take photographs of flowers, so here is the best shot of the day.

15 May 2008

Bloggers Unite for Human Rights

Human rights, human rights, human rights, human rights, and human rights! That's basically what has been churning around in my mind ever since I knew about Bloggers Unite for Human Rights Day.
Every time something like this comes up I think someone else can write something better than I can and surely everyone knows about the hot topics going on in the world right now. Hang on though, if everyone knows, why are we talking about it again? What is it about these issues that make it seem almost impossible to solve?
I watch the documentaries and cry, not just a sniffle, sometimes full-blown snot and tears. Then twenty minutes later what am I doing? Probably sat a computer messing about blogging. I know its not apathy for the most part, it would be brutal to carry around that deep deep sadness all the time and not at all good for your mental health.
On this journey I am on to become a counsellor, you have to go back to basics when learning about what it is to be human and how counselling actually works. What do we need? From a basic level to the higher planes of self worth. Maslow came up with a hierarchy of needs, which started from the basic physiological needs all the way to self-actualisation.

When I look at this chart at the bottom, I read the physiological needs that are essential and think 'Shit!' how many people never even make it past this stage in their life. You can read some more about Maslow's hierarchy of needs here if you want Maslow's hierarchy of needs. As usual I am rambling while I try to pull some thoughts together, what am I trying to say?
Basically there are Billions of people out there that don't even get their basic needs met, over 1 Billion people still have NO access to clean drinking water, 3 billion have No access to sanitation, children are fighting in wars and monks are providing a physical barrier against machine guns. That's just a teeny tiny fraction of what's wrong around us. Bad things don't just happen in far off countries that we only see on the telly, bad things happen everywhere and affect everyone at some stage in their lives. Each and every one of these terrible things are just as important. I have asked myself some questions that cover some of safety and physiological needs and then provided some links to sites/organisations that are tackling these issues.

Do you have somewhere safe to live?
Yes I do, I sleep safely in my bed tonight and probably every other night.
Check out: Shelter

Do you have food to eat?
Yes I do.
Check out:World Food Programme

Do you have water to drink?
If I want glass water; I get off my arse and walk all of ten steps to get some.
But 1 BILLION people do not!
Check out: WaterAid

Do you have water to bathe in?
If I want to have a shower for ages and ages, I do it.
I want a bath, I have a bath and then a shower to.
3 BILLION people do not.
Check out: International Year of Sanitation

Do you have access to a toilet?
If I want to go the bathroom and sit on the throne, I do it.
3 BILLION people do not!
Check out: Unicef Sanitation

Do you have access to Information?
If I want to know something, I google it, go to the library, go to school, read a book, ask someone.
Check out:Become a blogger for Human Rights

Do you have the freedom to speak out?
If I want to rant, scream, doodle, I blog it, talk to my friends and many many other outlets.
Check out: Global Voices Online
Do you have access to medical treatment?
If I need to go the hospital I get to call an ambulance. If I have a sniffly nose I make an appointment with the doctor, phone the online doctors or go to the chemist.
Check out:Physicians for Human Rights

Can you wear what you want?
I can wear what ever I want or nothing at all, I can do it.
Check out: Human Rights Watch

Yep I can pretty much get whatever I want or need.

Speaking out about Human Rights is not about making a difference to people and places that you have never heard about and will never see, well not for me anyways. Its also not about making you feel guilty about having nice things, loving families and other pleasures in life.
I will wait to see if I am born as a modern day saint in another life, this time round I just want to feel like I have helped out even just one person.

Bloggers Unite

14 May 2008

Doodle Mad!

Oh noes! Its the Last day of Doodle Week!
Doodle Week finishes with the theme
Doodle Mad!
Being of sound mind and body I really struggled with this theme, who came up with this one? I haven't got a mad bone in my body. So I thought about what is madness? It must be when people disagree with my plans to take over the world and then refuse to worship me! People like Neonboobly! He continues to visit here and comment but never signs up to become a minion, so he has been doodled into a straight jacket and stuck in a doodle cupboard until he changes his mind. The last person that seriously disagreed with me had their head shrunk and made into a helium balloon, that's not mad is it?
Luckily I have my evil little sidekick and willing man slaves, I keep the man slaves in tight pants to show off their assets and make me happy.
I suppose being the ruler of the world I will have to put up with revolutionists and pesky anarchists trying to over throw me, they wont win because they are the mad ones.

Am i Doodle Mad?

I hope you have had as much fun as I have with Doodle Week! lets do it again sometime.

13 May 2008

Doodle Abstract

You have made it to Day 6 of Doodle Week!
Today the theme is
Doodle Abstract.
Definition: Abstract art is art that does not depict objects in the natural world, but instead uses colour and form in a non-representational way.

From that definition I think it means anything that comes out of my noggin is rather abstract so I can doodle whatever bollocks I like.

Abstract Claire

Can you believe Doodle Week is nearly over!
Doodle Mad tomorrow.

11 May 2008

Doodle Daydream

Welcome to Day Five of Doodle Week!
Today its Doodle Daydream
Now a daydream is when you idly think about your wildest fantasies, which may include plans to take over the world, have lots of man slaves, people worshipping you and so forth. Oh and magic powers so I could smite anyone that pissed me off, my this sounds like a great daydream!
So great I just doodled it!

Claire daydreams

I also doodle,doodle, doodle in class too and have throughout my school life. Here are few samples of that.
Classroom doodles 1Classroom doodles 2

I have included not one but two cats for my Manic Monday contribution.

Doodle Flower!

I wasn't planning on giving yesterdays doodle an ending, but then after reading the comments I thought about it some more.The doodles below show graphic violence and nudity.

The story so far...
A horny tiger enraged with lust because of heavy steroid abuse had cornered Doodle Claire and was about to eat her or shag her or both.
Luckily nekkid stick Claire came to the rescue and Doodle Claire escaped with just a mild pawing, but poor Doodle Claire was left to clean up the bloody mess.

Kitty gets it

Luckily there was a near by pool so Doodle Claire could get naked and clean up. While Doodle Claire gets back to nature and admires all the pretty flowers, there may be someone or something lurking......

My doodle flower

Tomorrow its Doodle Phone book scribble/Day dreaming scribble!

10 May 2008

Doodle Animal!

Hello and welcome to day three of Doodle Week!
Today the theme is
Doodle Animal!
I have was inspired by Mr.45 as he suggested a Tiger, the rest just evolved from there. I thought seeing as so many cat bloggers have joined in on Doodle Week, they would also appreciate a big pussy cat!

Doodle Animal 1

Oh noes! what will happen next?
Yay! Nekkid Stick Claire to the rescue!

doodle animal part 2

Still loving Doodle Week?